Is
this a product of envy that I am not enjoying what they are enjoying? Have I
been envious seeing foreign exchange students wherein the people I know are
enjoying their chances staying abroad and learning from the outside? Yes, I am
feeling a little bit down that I am not experiencing what they are privileged
at. I am having one of those healthy
sessions of being envy as to motivate myself.
People
are studying abroad, for what? Another good additive to their brand so as to
have authority over those who did not have any? It is because there is the
avenue of great minds? Why can we not make our home great by our own sustenance
as how they did? Typically, we still do not have a niche on our own. We are
even alien at our own language and so am I in writing this one. Yes, if they
are great by their own right, therefore we can be also the problem is we over
patronize what is not ours.
People
are travelling? Has travelling gone cheap? Or do I belong to the underpaid
“professionals” who barely survives in his salary? Or are my priorities first
to establish my own reputation to increase my credentials and salary? So that I
can purchase myself a decent lot and house for my own? Have I been burdening
myself with survival first before actualizing the artistic side of travel and
expansion of horizon?
Have
I been left out in philosophy? I am not contented with my exam results, and I
am myself to blame. Where am I now in my trade? I use to have glorious
pedestals, but they were the what were once, nothing recent actually. My
friends are in groups and here I am alone and studying by myself.
In
my being as a teacher, have I really passed knowledge? Or no! Not just passed,
but transmitted the attitude of thinking? Where does that lead them to? Our
system sees no importance of thinkers. Not even an individual will have the
leisure of speculation. What am I teaching then? Just for the sake of thinking
beautiful thoughts? And for what? They will be doctors, engineers and experts
in their won fields someday, I will be left as just a part in their TOR and I
will be forgotten.
Have
I contributed something to society? Have I paid back with my quality service as
being a filter and a breeding instrument in the educational system? What have I
done other than just merely survive?
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