Skip to main content

Merry Monday of May Musings


I am a person who is hard to himself in experiencing happiness. Oftentimes, I shove away the opportunities that came which supposedly make me feel jubilant. However, I had never felt a great sense of joy not until I know Johannah Joy. There was no other way for me but to love her and it felt awesome to be loved in return. There is indeed no greater feeling than to know and feel that one is loved. Ever since we got married, every waking moment is worth it. The sun greets me with the illumination of her face besides mine on bed. The presence warms me, assures me that this person is willing to live with me until I die. The day is not complete if it does not start with her when I wake up and does not end with her when I am to close my eyes. Other than my family whom I hold dear, she too shares the same spot. The spot where I am afraid to lose people. There is no greater joy than having my wife and seeing her face and knowing that I am loved. I treasure her. If my treasure seems to be far, my heart pounds as if it is going to exit my body. As they say, for where your treasure is, there will your heart be also. I love her so much!

The why of my life is my wife (whylife – whyfe – wife, just playing with words). Money cannot buy her smile and when she does so, I get it for free and best when it is for or because of me. Looking at her is also looking at my responsibility, the need to take care of her, serve her and keep her smiling. In my despair she gives me light although at times I am so hardheaded. Her voice is endearing and I know it is for all because she is kind but I feel special because she chose to be with me for all of my life while being kind. The world became colorful because of her and I too slowly learn to be kind for she infected me with it. It is heartwarming to continually know that she is mine and I am hers. With that, I am even ashamed to unleash my anger in front of her because she is too fragile. I am always reminded to take care of her, to let her feel my love. It is time to step into her long desire for us. It is time to let go of the egotistical Karl and follow the lead of my wife for a better life. She is now the ultimate center of the why of my life.

Why does she kiss me in the morning? Why does she kiss me before we sleep? Why does she randomly kiss me? Why does she play with my belly fat? Why does she nag me to make me do exercises? Why does she call me when we are far? Why does she cook for me? Why does she tell me to have a haircut? Why does she call me when she needs help? Why does she massage my back? Why does she tell me to massage her back? Why does she remind me to eat? Why does she listen to me when I have problems? Why does she dream about our future? Why does she take care of me when I get sick? Why does she call me ‘babe’? Why does she dream of having babies with me as the father? Why does she “sleep with me”? Why does she hug me often? Why does she tell me that she sleeps better when I am beside her? Why does she throw her mood swings at me? Why does she want to have a date with me? Why does she take a photo of me while sleeping? Why does she do the laundry sometimes? Why does she tell me to wear nice clothes?

Because she loves me! The things she would do for love.



Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Fin?

  Last 2012, there were hearts on fire that both had their first shared flame in an unlikely place. I was thirsty for love coming from being dormant while she was searching for a redemption from a series of broken hearts. Both struggled to find their place. Both trying to live their lives free from the hideous chains of a dark home. I must admit that I fell for her beauty and add to that, her care. As we both clasped our hands, it was a committed long shot to have the perfect rest for our hearts. It was a bit strange to have an affair under the noses of all that is forbidden both profession and a line of faith. Nothing was wrong as long both were in the ecstasy of love – no malice, no foul play, no trespassing of wills. That moment was a perfect episode in a romantic film – one where young love sprang amidst treacherous circumstances. We lived through the happiness of newfound belongingness and the battle of keeping that alive. 4 years before the wedlock were filled with ups an...
Post a Comment
Read more

November in My Heart

I never thought I got to see you up close as you walked out of the airport’s terminal exit. I never thought that I got to hold your hand last Friday, neither could I believe that we hugged and kissed as we went to our friend’s car. Your voice never felt so real, and never felt so up close for a very long time. I could not believe the ride to the hotel, hearing you laugh, lending me your handkerchief as I was still sulking in disbelief. Your hands felt so real while you were pressing them hard as I was still emotional. It felt like bliss when you ate your first chicken joy meal in 7 months while getting shocked seeing the cake with a small bundle of roses. You told me that you felt like a woman, and that statement rang in my head because I successfully made you feel like one. And I took a photo of you with your advanced birthday presents. Just 6 days ago, we made love after a long 7 dry month period. Your hugs and kisses were not any more fantasies, but realities. I could not believe ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Third Wedding Anniversary: A Reflection

It has been three years and I have never regretted nor doubted the fact of my marriage to her. The decision was borne out of choice and borne out of love and if it was not, I could have moved on and changed my direction when our relationship was challenged and cut off during those years. Yet, I chose to stay not because of conscience nor was I forced to but because I truly love her. Stern as I am, I rarely give my heart to people. I can relate and talk with almost anybody, but most of the times they are simply mechanical as if I was condemned to interact given the situation that I am in. However, I am the kind of person who carefully selects who to be intimate with. I can be there for anybody, but I chose not to because I can only be with someone who I know is worth it. My wife is worth it. We had so much conflict before, especially when she was still in the process of overcoming a problematic home environment, role confusion and deep sense of self-pity coming from self-doubt. Ha...
Post a Comment
Read more