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This One Goes Out to the One's Who Love

                We know that falling and being in love is one of the greatest feelings to someone who have ever existed. All the more especially when we are the object of such devotion. But I think there is a difference from a person who begins to love because he or she is lonely than a person who loves because he or she really do love. For one, to the one who felt loneliness, there is the need to love for a unconscious demand of being loved in return and that is why one tends to love to catch someone’s attention so as to be reciprocated and thus the loneliness be dispelled. But to one who simply loves without conditions brought upon neither by the other nor from one’s own circumstance, then that is truly something sincere.

                As a popular saying goes that you cannot love others without loving yourself first is indeed true. For to those who never found solitude in themselves even in times of being alone, then one is weak in handling one’s self and especially if one seeks companions just for a temporary delusion and dispelling of being alone. If one cannot love one’s self in one’s own loneliness then that definitely poses a problem of merely usurping the object of love as a cure to the drought of loneliness.

                It is hard if one’s cup is empty and one starts to give emptiness, because there is nothing really given. It is hard also if one does not know how to fill one’s own cup if one waits for the other to fill in for them and the abuse of that will lead to usurpation and that is something dangerous. Sometimes we ask ourselves why our relationship failed. Was it because someone was utterly giving it all and the other was simply receiving and upon that other’s frailty the other was pushed to the limit in giving all one could until that someone became drained and stressed? I guarantee you, that even to the self-sufficient ones who have a sincere heart to the frail, when the other simply does not know how to stand on one’s own for long, then eventually the stress comes of having false hopes of being a martyr.

                One could never be a God in love in permanence, but one could be in meantime. But to demand the God out of the other is simply too idealistic and too much of a wish for the other is just as limited as you are. Remember that we still are humans and the one who gambles his heart on you in all out devotion seeks also a kind return to mutually fill what was lost so that both can just mutual reciprocate but if one is merely receiving and spilling out the abundance of the gifts, then eventually the limited source will run dry and it may take awhile to rejuvenate lost spirit.


                One works out to be independent enough and self-sufficient enough to work as a productive and effective partner in times of the other’s crisis and enough strength to temporarily carry at hand the other while yet recovering from lost spirit. But if one is not independent enough, then that poses a problem because the other cannot enjoy the aid of being helped and carried upon when one is at one’s crisis. Therefore, it should be a guarantee that one is an individual enough to carry along the joys and trials of having a relationship, because there is WE and not simply and I in a tandem. 

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