Arguments have their place whether be it in the academe, politics,
social issues these powerful mind boggling language statements are given much
credit as a show of intellectual prowess. Yet these mental exercises are
crucial to the development of science, technology, history, literature,
philosophy and many more of the disciplines created by man in his conquest for
truth and exercise of reason. Man is competitive and wishes to dominate and
that is why there is the need to devise impenetrable logical schemes to win
over the other and later on will be the maxim to be followed. Yet, reason and
its arrogance also have a downfall especially when one goes towards in handling
a woman. Yes, we always experience the tensions between lovers when reason will
be at play and amongst boys we listen to reason, but to women it is a different
game.
Consider this as an account of my experience with my betrothed. It is already
instilled in me the ideas of settling down, security and the like, but to my
woman, that is still far yet for her age. Yes, I value her freedom to explore
yet the world, but here I am valuing legacy through children, a future family
and security of relationship, so much more of a cage to the so called
butterfly. An early age like mine is strange to the most because of the
futuristic tendencies. Some women find it hard to see most of their men are not
oriented towards commitment and here I am chained to that thought. But no
matter, that kind of thinking is one of the chokeholds that I am surely using
in relating with my girlfriend. I agree, it is detrimental to her, when she yet
has a life to explore. Reason played so well of security and logistics only to
feel itself drained trying to tame a free soul.
Here comes the argument part. It is inevitable that there are tensions within
our relationship and that is no excuse because even blood brothers or sisters
carry also the same nuisance. Here then is the deal, there are times when egos
are clashing and reasoning comes into play and there, the egos furthermore
converge and when the stress is so much there is then the need to diverge. I
for one carry the fault of overly listening to her and in her suggestions I
critically slice them with the rigors of my reason and the purpose of which is
to meet halfway, but that is somewhat too idealistic. Even I seeing her
unconscious afflictions to me and in the consequence telling her about it in
any tactical tone it seems not right to distort her carefree happy go lucky
mood. So here is now the thing, when she says something, I should be quiet and
I don’t have to say something negative.
Although it is sad that when we give effort to put something serious in the
relationship through talking things out (as how parents and married couples do)
and in that effort of seriousness we are discarded as something distasteful. I
agree, a bird is not be caged and it is my fault to impose four walls upon a
delicate creature. When we begin to argue, even though in argument I won,
but there is the loss inside to making her lose. No comment on the losing side,
because naturally when I lose, I accept my dilemma. But in argumentation, win
or lose, I lose because I have brought her down. Now comes the futility of
reason over handling that portion of the relationship, aggression and logic are
hard tools to a woman and must be avoided. Again, win or lose, man lose, I
lose.
I guess, I slowly understand that in loving a woman, just let her be, when she
hurts you, just don’t say anything (have the powerful heart of not minding).
When something is wrong, don’t say anything for it will disrupt her mood. A
prudent silence is needed to keep the peace between both. Therefore, all she
must hear are the beautiful and the good (the evils willl be reserved for alone
time shouting it out aloud in a mountain top). Just let her be, just let her
fly through you, hurt or bothered, we are not to say anything just to keep the
relationship burning. Our reason must surrender to theirs and I have to admit
there is some happiness into it that when a man is joyfully on his knees at
total service and respect to his woman. I find all the bowels of hell when we
argue even though I win, but deep inside, I find the solitude to serve her, but
I am just a mere human, I seldom cannot withstand to be silent, but to love her
is to be prudently silent.
Argument? I’ll bury that when I am faced with her. I will reserve that in the
classroom and with my friends because when facing her, it is all about
acceptance. As a man, I shall train myself to be prudently silent and love her
and let her be, and fly. Walay titi Archu. Matod pa sa akong migo, parehas sa
kaka ug sa praying mantis, kung gugma, kan.on jud ta mga laki sa babae, ug mao na
atong kalipay. ^_^
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