Skip to main content

I Would Gladly Watch Them Burn


Sometimes I hit myself with remorseful thoughts. I have reached the point and have asked myself: “Why should I continue on teaching?”. Let me tell you straight that I have no license to teach (not technically a professional and finishing quality graduate studies while working overload is very hard). I graduated from an arts course, and if you can also consider the context of a major in philosophy here in the Philippines. It came to me that I have made a wrong choice because it offered me nothing in this industrialized world. I could have been better off with any of the technical vocational popular courses which are in line with the demands of the market, yet I chose a course that brought me more ignorance once I studied it even more. More so, I landed on the very field I thought I can do best and that is teaching. Giving to you my background earlier, it goes to show I do not get paid well. Let me be honest to myself, I am not worth as much as those who have the necessary papers to prove their wage's worth.

I thought I was graced by the school I worked in to have received a very surprising pay. So surprising that it was double than what I usually earn. For three years, I was basking on that raise, and it was only later that I found out that it was an error. Nonetheless, when I first came into contact with that salary, I really thought I deserved it. I deserved it not because of credentials but due to the merit from my work. However, when I was told that it was a mistake, I lost hope on merit. Merit does not exist in the chosen profession I worked. With all the positive feedback paired with my popularity in school, I thought I was indeed becoming an influential person through teaching, and that I am getting rewarded for the things that I have done. I did not care about the praises coming from my superiors, as long as majority of the students in school saw me worth it. I am directed towards serving my clients, and the school administrators are not the clients. All these feedbacks from the students, the way they treated and continue to treat me, the way that they approached me, and all the more the way they compared me to all other teachers in the department flattered me to the core. The greatest flattery was to always hear my students say: “All students should go through you sir!”. For almost five years of servitude, I have increased my reputation, and I did not wish to grab the attention and amicability of a bureaucratic administration plagued with friendship bonds and favorites because they will all crumble under the greatest stockholder who are the students. Yet, the students so far are far from autonomous beings, and I think my classes are nothing but a breather for them (not being simple, but a taste of something exquisite). It is like they have tuned in into that part of the radio that deals with all the romantic ideals which filled their youthful passions. I have most of the love in school not until these other factors came.

Inasmuch as I am to be honest about being wrongfully paid due to the credentials which I lack, these people do not hear the echoes of my name around the school. If the clients are satisfied, they always refer to that employee who made them feel such. But of course, they do not eat in the grassroots, jive with the students, talk with them because that is not their concern; thus, they will never hear the echoes. And if they do, the lame excuse of a rationalized institution and protocols with all of its legitimizing hold on all processes takes place; thus, what is supposedly given is what is supposedly due. Due not in terms of work performance, but due in terms of the tag of quality assurance one has. No matter how shiny the bullet is, if it cannot kill, maim, or at least injure, then that bullet is a dud. Double the class size, pretend it is manageable with lofty pedagogical innovations which by principle was never a concern of quality education but of profitability. Double the work,  and what is worse, reduce the pay. It is fucking ironic to see others work and are paid higher just because of credentials; and yes, we both are doing the same job, and I can slap it to their faces I am even doing it better. They cannot live up to the subject matter by content and yet they think by masterfully playing with strategies they can make it happen without the essential guide of the subject matter? I got to break it to them, majority of the subjects in the new curriculum are under my field and not even by the college degree that I took, but by interest, and I do have the gall to claim competence. Yet it pisses me off to see these incompetents paid decently with the areas they are even clueless about. Let me vent out my anger and jealousy. Yes, they will tell me to get the necessary credentials, but if we just follow what is just, I would gladly slap my brain to their empty papers. Isn’t it nice also that we are learning from each other, oh yes! We the cheap competent are helping the helpless incompetents paid decently. Exploit us more! See? Your degrees do not match your capabilities. Fucking unfair to hear wages match with papers which do not translate to capabilities.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Article Review on Elinita Garcia's "Gabriel Marcel: Primary and Secondary Reflection"

Summary:             Gabriel Marcel is a known French existentialist. His co-Frenchman, Jean-Paul Sartre, distinguished existentialism into two which were coined as  atheistic  and  theistic  (Christian) wherein Sartre did mention Marcel as part of the latter in lecture on Existentialism a Humanism . Marcel is a Christian existentialist because he included the divine even amidst the infamous perception of existentialism as godless. Moreover, he is also known for his non-systematic philosophy where he pointed out that the philosophical discipline starts from where one is (referring to the particularity of the situation); therefore, it is not from metaphysical assumptions or already laid down theories.             Marcel’s thoughts talk about the importance and the necessity of reflection wherein he divides it into two as a) primary reflection and b) secondary reflection. Reflection for Marcel is “nothing other than attention, i.e. directed towards this sort of small break
Post a Comment
Read more

Fin?

  Last 2012, there were hearts on fire that both had their first shared flame in an unlikely place. I was thirsty for love coming from being dormant while she was searching for a redemption from a series of broken hearts. Both struggled to find their place. Both trying to live their lives free from the hideous chains of a dark home. I must admit that I fell for her beauty and add to that, her care. As we both clasped our hands, it was a committed long shot to have the perfect rest for our hearts. It was a bit strange to have an affair under the noses of all that is forbidden both profession and a line of faith. Nothing was wrong as long both were in the ecstasy of love – no malice, no foul play, no trespassing of wills. That moment was a perfect episode in a romantic film – one where young love sprang amidst treacherous circumstances. We lived through the happiness of newfound belongingness and the battle of keeping that alive. 4 years before the wedlock were filled with ups and do
Post a Comment
Read more

Bertrand Russell and the Sense of Sin

Introduction             Ethics is this study of what is good and what is bad and throughout the course of history it had also its shares of disputes and animosities. But beneath all of it is that ethics is a means in order to arrive at happiness or the good life. Because we have to act correspondingly or in a certain manner wherein we can get to attain harmony within ourselves especially regarding to our conscience or in harmony with others in order to keep relationships or ultimately to preserve one’s self or to attain such security whether externally and that is in relation with others or internally or personal satisfaction. Our actions are guided by principles of which we take actions correspondingly but the question lies what then are these principles and sometimes we go back to our way of understanding or our metaphysical assumptions wherein we garner from these in order to make way into how we conduct ourselves in our actions. In this paper then, I will explicate Bertrand
Post a Comment
Read more